Corner Stones

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Seeing the smiles on the faces of the children above, it would be hard to imagine that they were abandoned by people delegated by God  to care for them :(. Those were the thoughts that went through my head while I was at an Orphanage recently (Abuja Children's Home – visit sometime :)) and those thoughts have been filtering in and out of my head all week; Why go through the hassle of carrying a child for nine months, go through the pains of child birth and then give that same child up?...I still can't comprehend it. 

It's really heart shattering when you visit these kids and all they do is hold on tightly to you, craving the love and affection that almost everyone who grew up in an average family takes for granted.  I am not an advocate of abortions but what makes a person who commits abortion at the early stage of pregnancy different from someone who carries it full term and then dumps the child in a dumpster?. What is the huge difference? *confused face*, because in my humble opinion, I think they are very closely related; the difference maybe that in the first instance you have to come to terms with the fact that you "killed" a fetus while in the second instance you live with  an illusion and in an absolute state of denial, thinking a good Samaritan will pick the child up from the dumpster *raised eyebrow*. What if the child dies, is that not the same as "killing" a child?.

I can go on and on with my questions :), but the major thing I and a lot of people (I guess) would want to know is why give up on something you spent nine months of your life nurturing?. Why?

PS: Deviating just a little from my line of questioning :), I would like to suggest that we create a little time out of our verrrryyyy busy schedules to visit these places (Orphanages) from time to time. Trust me, you will feel like a million bucks for putting that smile on the faces of these children, try it…it won’t hurt and they don’t bite :).

“At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done.

We will be judged by 'I was hungry and you gave me to eat, I was naked and you clothed me, I was homeless and you took me in.'

Hungry not only for bread -- but hungry for love. Naked not only for clothing -- but naked for human dignity and respect. Homeless not only for want of a room of bricks -- but homeless because of rejection” - Mother Teresa

“I expect to pass through this world but once; any good thing therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again” - Stephen Grellet

Smile. 

Dream Weavers

As we grow older, certain words come into play in our lives; such as : Comfort Zones (the inability to try out something totally new or different from your normal everyday routine), and Fear (the increased sensitivity to failure or outright downplay of our Individual strengths). 

We get so engrossed with what the Society expects from us, people's opinion especially concerning our capabilities. 

What happened to those carefree days? When we were fearless enough to try riding a bicycle with or without a helmet, When we could stand up, dust ourselves up after eating "dust" and try again and again until we master the craft of bicycle riding.

Friends

Another article from the archive of Ms. Faith Alfa.

Enjoy :) :

I saw a Blackberry display message a while back that had something to do with Friendship, it made mention of different types of friends;

• There are usually those who will tell you the truth no matter how badly it will hurt.
• There are those who will always tell you what you wanna hear (whether its the truth or not) and;
• There are those who try to 'balance' it out. 

So which would you rather have and which would you rather be? You know with 'truth' sometimes comes 'bitterness' (but the right perspective of things) and when we make people tell us what we wanna hear, we invariably turn them to liars and the lies we hear, may end up causing us to walk into 'life's ditches'. 

And there is the "finding balance" people who mix both, and so seem diplomatic but then with these ones you almost never really know when to listen to them and when not to. 

So which are you up for? The Truth tellers, the Ones who speak to soothe your heart or the Ones who find a balance?

Semira's Reply (Moi) : Please give me the "Truth Tellers" anytime, any day. It may hurt when it being done but eventually these are the people and memories stored up / engraved in my mind's "walk of fame" (never to be erased for saving my a** from that mess I may have blindly walked into :) ).  Besides there is a saying; “Only your true friend tells you when your face is dirty”.

Different strokes for different folks though, so what is your preference?. Please tell :).

Written by Ms. Faith Alfa (Guest Writer) 

Unconditional Love

It feels good to be back (sort of...since am still posting this article via a guest writer :) ).  Well, my "writing juice" has been low for a while now, it seems to come and go as fast as fuel in Naija does (one day its here in abundance and the next its gone bringing with it endless queues). 

Fortunately for me, I got a reliable "black marketer" (Ms. Faith Alfa) who knows where to get a constant supply of fuel (writing juice in this case) and she graciously wrote and forwarded two articles, which am going to share with YOU, my adorable reader :).

Enjoy:

I dunno know where to start but I know I want to write about unconditional love and in all truthfulness when I think of love and the 'unconditional' one for that matter,  GOD comes to mind.

Am guessing if I asked you guys (and girls), the meaning of 'love' you'd all come up with different meanings of love.  When I seat to think of it though, ultimately God is Love. God loves us beyond measure. He is so patient with us. We do all these bad things and because of His nature (which is love), he opens His arms and heart to us when we return to Him.

The Bible gives all these wonderful attributes of love, which as far as I can tell only God is able to give and be. So truly God is Love. Hey, take for example the beauty of being able to wake up, even in the dead of the night, call on God and the 'knowing' that he'd be listening to you, or the concept of knowing a God who never sleeps nor slumber, who'd watch over you, day and night? Or the joy or knowing that he cares so much for you that He gave His only Begotten Son to die for you. I can go on and on but am sure you get it now, the awesomeness of God is beyond words and the depth of His love........... I think, can only be imagined.

God Loves you and me unconditionally.  When you are up remember that He gave You the blessings of being up and when You are down, remember God is always available to lead and help You, (if you are willing to listen) and also that all men ( who you think can help you) are only, but instruments in His hands. Essentially, I hope we learn to value this great gift of Love, unconditionally given to us by God.

Smile.

Written by Faith Alfa (Guest Writer)

Diary of a Young Naija Guy (Part 2)

…and the Story continues :).

“Look at you!” I heard someone say. I raised my head and it was the ATM lady - Nancy.

“Wow, look at you too!” I was surprised to see her but I was happy I didn’t have to wait till Monday to see her again.

“Happy Friday!” She screamed because of the noise, “Wanna dance?”

I didn’t even have the chance to answer, she had already pulled me to dance floor. I really suck at dancing but she helped me; she was a great dancer! I had fun! At some point we decided to go to a private area and we talked about a lot of things; ranging from work, business to personal life. I tried to hide my ring as much as possible, I certainly didn’t want this to end now.

“You are a really wonderful lady. You are so interesting, any guy would want to be with you all day” I said.

“I wasn’t always like this but I have learnt the hard way that life is just too short to be sad”. she replied.

Then her phone rang…

“Hey baby! Yeah I’m at the private lounge, I’d like you to meet someone, alright boo” she talked excitedly as usual.

I was in shock until this tall Handsome Man walks up to her and kisses her.

“You are late. Meet Dayo; I met him this morning, he is helping with my ATM that I told you got swallowed and Dayo this is my B to the O-O,” she laughed “Meet my husband Kolade, we only come here to dance every fortnight Friday; away from work, stress and kids.”

“Wow, a pleasure” I managed to shake him.

Then she stood now excitedly holding her husband’s arms.

“Why don’t we invite Dayo for Mimi’s 16th birthday tomorrow?” Her husband said.

They have kids too? How long have they been married and they look like a couple just dating!

“Silly me, please come for my second daughter’s 16th tomorrow. It would be an honor” She brought out an I.V from her purse. I began to feel so ashamed of myself, this was another guy like me, getting it right with one woman.

I collected the I.V and promised to be there.

“See you tomorrow! Have you had something to eat Kolade?” she talked and dragged her husband along.

They left and I kept staring at the thin air like I had seen a ghost. They come just to dance together every fortnight Fridays? Why didn’t I think of that! Temi loves to dance, she also likes long walks, she loves to talk, she loves jazz music; there is this vivid picture I have of me putting her hand on my chest when we danced at a jazz club on our first year anniversary. I found myself typing all the things I knew Temi loved to do on my Ipad and I realized I had denied her of all. I had made her the old woman she acts like.

What the hell was I doing here! I didn’t even tell my friends goodbye, I walked out of the club into my car. Temi’s call came through and I picked at the first ring.

“Temi?” My heart raced.

“I know you are not coming home…”

“I am, stay up so we can gist. Been a while” I decided to do everything on that list and to even add many more for the rest of my lifetime with her.

“Are you alright?” She was shocked, I suppose.

“And I’d like us to go for a birthday party tomorrow. I want you to meet this amazing couple”

“You sound different Dayo”

“Maybe I’m different”

“Don’t say it! don’t say it! when you come we will gist very well” she laughed.

She laughed!!! In just that laughter that I hadn’t heard in a while, she sounded like the lady I married six years ago…

The End :).

 

Diary of a Young Naija Guy

A friend forwarded this "story" to me and I just think it makes so much sense, the suspense also makes it more intriguing.

So, it is time to "share" with my dear readers, enjoy :) : 

My name is Dayo. I am a typical Nigerian guy and I cherish my Fridays a lot; I get to hang out with the sickest guys every Friday night and secondly, it is another escape from my nagging and boring wife. I get confused sometimes on whether she is my mother or my wife. Don’t get it twisted; I love her to pieces. It just gets complicated; sometimes I even wish we never got married, marriage has turned her into something that doesn’t amuse me. I wish she was still the adventurous, charming, high spirited lady I dated for five years.

A lot of people say its unethical for married guys to be found in a club, but I wish everyone won’t be too quick to judge and understand that people look for fun to run away from their problems; they just want to breathe, like me.

I forgot to say that I work in new generation Bank in Lekki, I love my job and my job loves me, maybe it's because I am a senior banking officer :).

Well, this particular morning, a Lady breezed into my Office. My heart raced faster because I had not sighted anything this beautiful in a long while. She wasn’t the typical slender Barbie, in fact, she was a bit chubby but her smile and cuteness took my breath away and I just "tripped" instantly.

“Hi Good morning! Your ATM has swallowed my card!” She laughed, unlike a typical customer that would ram you.

I just tried to form Boss laughter…

“Good morning, You know what? I’d personally make sure they get it out for you, but not today. Can you wait till Monday?” I smiled.

“Banks shaaa! OK, can I just drop my number so you could call me up or just text when its ready so I don’t come twice? Please? My name is Nancy” She blinked her eyes in a funny way.

“Sure” I smiled.

We exchanged numbers. What a lucky Friday!

So it was 11:00pm and I headed to the club and as usual my friends were chilling for me. My wife had called a couple of times, I just ignored it, She knows I’m never home Friday nights...


Watch out for Part 2 :)

Marley's Definition of Love

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”
― Bob Marley

Now that is the kind of love we all wish for :). 

Mali Music - The Job Experience (The Video)

My friend just referred to him (Mali Music) as a prodigy and I absolutely agree.

Watch the video below and am sure you will agree with us when you are done.

Enjoy:)

Give Me – Kirk Franklin feat Mali Music

I seem to "stumble" upon great quotes and great people in recent times and Mali Music (a singer, songwriter and producer) is my newest discovery. A friend mentioned his name a while back but I assumed he was referring to music from Mali (the Country) and I was like huh, you and who will listen to Mali Music *not interested*, until yesterday, I was just fiddling with my remote control and BET came on, lo and behold my "newest discovery" was on TV, talking about God and gospel music in a cool and inspiring way and I got stuck.

So, naturally, the first thing I did when I got to work was to find out more about Mali Music and hmmmmm...all I can say is  that God knows how to create and deposit immense talent in people and Mali Music is one of those rare breed. He talks and sings about God in a way that will make you want to know God...simple.

I got some of his songs off YouTube and Give Me - Kirk Franklin ft Mali Music happens to be one of my favorite.

Enjoy and give me your verdict :) :

The Lyrics

[Mali]
Give me that joy I can't explain
Add extra peace that'll ease my pain
I want that love that'll never change
Give me that, Give me that

Give me that power to walk away
When another god wants to take your place
As much of you as I can take
Give me that, Give me that

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Anybody ready

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Ready for his glory

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
If your a seeker for life

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Let me tell you this story

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Every place that's dark

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
He will bring it to light

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Hypocritical hearts, back sliders, liars time to get right

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
See I include myself

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
I cast my own stones

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
I'm the man in the mirror y’all

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
I can see my own wrong


[Kirk Franklin speaking]
But I'm here by grace

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Through Christ by faith

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
I had to make that choice, I had to open up my mouth and say

[Mali]
Give me that joy I can't explain
Add extra peace that'll ease my pain
I want that love that'll never change
Give me that, Give me that

Give me that power to walk away
When another god wants to take your place
As much of you as I can take
Give me that, Give me that

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Anybody tired

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
You want the show to end

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Get the actors off stage, and let church begin

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Do you want a revolution?

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
You want to hear a new song?

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
God is cleaning up house

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
At first he started right at home

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
No more miracle water, prayer cloths, some money and fame

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
Everybody got a title, but do you know your name
[Kirk Franklin speaking]
If we humble ourselves, people

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
And fall on our face

[Kirk Franklin speaking]
And ask God everything in me that’s not right take it away

[Mali]
Gimme that joy I can't explain
Add extra peace that'll ease my pain
I want that love that'll never change
Give me that, Give me that

Oh I want that power to walk away
When another god wants to take your place
As much of you as I can take
Give me that, Give me that
[2x]

[Mali]
And I choose you today, cuz I need you today
I cant get away
See, there's no escape
See what you done to me
I'm not the same ol' me
You took away everything
Now you're my everything

[choir sings]
I choose you today, cuz I need you today
I cant get away
See, there's no escape
See what you done to me
I'm not the same ol' me
You took away everything
Now you're my everything

[Mali]
Give me that God that breathes life into nostrils of man
A sovereign God who predestined creation before time began
I want a God who would really add some elegance, decorate the darkness with stars
The God who orchestrates the future, at the same time He knows where you are
Give that God who supplies my needs 'cause He owns all the cattle on the hills
And He's the God that wipes my tears, and provides enough to pay all my bills
Gimmie me that God, that's the God I'm talking about
Gimmie me that God, that's the God I'm talking about
Give me that, Give me that
Give me that, Give me that

Gimme that joy I can't explain
I'm so happy, you make me happy
Gimme that joy I can't explain
Add extra peace that'll Add extra peace, ease my pain
I want that love that'll never change
Give me that, Give me that, Give me that ......

 Video

Random Quotes (1)

I just stumbled upon a lovely quote by Walter Anderson, which in itself is self-explanatory and summarises how I view life.

Enjoy:

“I am responsible. Although I may not be able to prevent the worst from happening, I am responsible for my attitude toward the inevitable misfortunes that darken life. Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have – life itself.”
Walter Anderson

Simple yeah?

Do have a great weekend...TGIF :).

Sweetest Taboo

I was with my mom some weeks back and had the urge to write about "love", actually scribble the "story" on a Kleenex (we were in a restaurant at the time, thus the absence of my keyboard or a paper). I kept the note in my wallet until now, thought it wise to upload it before the "writing material" falls apart.

Here is what I wrote, it may be considered as fiction or non-fiction :). I guess that is left for me to know and for you to find out :).

Enjoy:

The sun was glaring, as bright as a burning furnace and as hot as my heart beat when I think about my first love.

He used to be everything to me; my first touch, my first stolen kiss and the first cause of butterflies in my tummy.

Oh sweet love.

Love then had meaning; it was free, naive and effortless. I did not have to smile the right way or love the right way, I was just LOVED.

I can vividly remember the first day I laid my eyes on him, my heart literally stopped and to my medium size frame, he looked like the duplication of “Thor”; his broad shoulders, his clear brown eyes (not blue in this case) and his strong chocolatey voice…hmmmm, thinking about him now still gives me goose bumps.

…and lunch came to an end and so did my story, I like it unfinished though, who knows when the “inspiration of cupid” will strike me again…just maybe I will conclude it or better still you can play around with it and conclude yourself.

To be continued.

Our New Mrs.

Blowing the dust off my blog :). I have been away for a while, not totally my fault though.

My first true love (my elder sister) got married this weekend and we were all sooooo busy. But the stress was worth every single smile I saw on my sister's face.

The event took us down memory lane, to those days when we used to "plan" our future. Ideally, we are supposed to have "dropped" two kids each by now...lol, but I guess life had a different and much better plan in mind :).

I have marked the weekend as a milestone in my life (yels, am tapping from my sister's joy) because not only did I see my sister very happy but I also got a very nice and caring brother-in-law.

Our childhood friends were also there to spice up the event and it was fun reminiscing on those good ol' days.

And I have never seen my mom dance as much as she did that day, the woman just kept twisting her waist and I was just praying she doesn't fall down, but alas the "strength of a proud mama" fell on her and she danced the day away.

All in all, it was a great event and am very grateful to God for making everything fall into place perfectly.

:). 

Moments to Treasure (1)

On the first Sunday of July, I finally got to carry out the first phase of my "New Year Resolution" (visit an orphanage monthly)...it's six months overdue but I guess its better late than never.

Above are some of the beautiful faces I encountered during the course of my "visit". I couldn't get a lot of pictures because the children where more interested in playing than posing for a photo shoot :).

But it was a fulfilling and interesting time of my life, most especially it was PRICELESS being able to make these children who were "abandoned" by the people designated by God to look after them, smile.

I honestly can't explain the amount of joy and satisfaction I felt when I left the Orphanage and i eagerly look forward to another visit next month.

Food for Thought: 

Such acts of kindness cost very little and if some of us can save a small part of the money we splurge on drinks, food, clothes, cars e.t.c, we would have enough to spare in making a child out there feel wanted.

Think about it :).

"Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little, do something now" – Edmund Burke

Smile.

Unrefined Poetry

This is a "poem" I just scribbled down, its still raw and probably too "unrefined" for poets out there but it’s still something I want to share :).

Enjoy:

When the nights are dark and long;

Who will hold me.

When the world seems cold and empty;

Who will comfort me.

When my heart bleeds in silence;

Who will see my pain.

When my future seems bleak and jumbled;

Who will re-position my focus.

When I need someone to talk to or just vent;

Who will listen.

When the weight of responsibility seems too heavy for my fragile shoulders;

Who will carry my cross.

When the road seems rough and narrow;

Who will lead me through.

And yet I go to bed again with the same questions,

With the same pain and confusion;

And just when I thought all hope was lost;

YOU held me and whispered in my ears;

I AM HERE.

The Rocking Chair

This article may be "ironic" coming from someone who "used" to worry and be anxious about every single thing but who else can aptly tell a story about how "useless" worrying can be than a recovering "worrier" huh?.

And yes please, that is what I call myself these days (a recovering worrier) and I use the word "recovering" because its a process. You can't just wake up one beautiful morning and decide that you are not going to worry about life anymore and gbam!!!!...like magic you get your wish.

Of course it would be so much easier that way but "unfortunately" it takes time, God's grace (very essential) and a total change in the way one sees life.

Am not a philosopher or a psychiatrist, so I wouldn't know jack about the tools or techniques to use to get over worrying but I did/doing it my way, which is quite simple;

All I did was to hinge my life on God, because at the end of the day the only reason I used to worry about every single thing was because I relied on my own strength (which fails) without looking up to the "ultimate strength".

So whenever that "fear" creeps in and starts trying to eat me up (raising my blood pressure...smh), I simply remember God's promise about not forgetting His children and that calms my heart because I know no matter how turbulent life gets, have got the "biggest shoulder" to lean on.

So instead of sitting on that "rocking chair" that has never taken me anywhere, I chose to stand firmly on God's words and I have absolutely no regrets.

So if you see my smiling when it seems like my world is crumbling down, don't assume am high on cheap drugs :)...I have just decided to do the best i can do and let God take care of the rest.

Life is good.



Smile.