Love Story:how death led to life

 

Short Story

Bola was the life of the party; she had the latest clothes, knew the hot spots and was the unopposed leader of her bubbling group of hot chicks. Nonso is the classic definition of a geek; quiet, studious and to top it up he was a very very religious brother. 

Time and fate led Bola's and Nonso's paths to cross and for some reason (maybe opposites really does attract) an intense love filled relationship started between the duo. There was something about Bola now; a certain glow, and Nonso suddenly developed a more confident stride in his steps. 

But there was a huge problem...

Neither could share this new found exciting-giddy-intense-feeling with their close friends or even the public. How would Nonso explain falling in love with Bola, a "sinner"? How would Bola keep her social prestige intact after falling in love with geekolious Nonso (that was the nickname she and her group had coined for him), surely they would laugh at her? 

So they kept it on the down low until neither could contain their excitement; for it was already obvious something had changed in both parties, and they decided to tell the whole world about their relationship, regardless of the effect such public declaration would cause and it sure did cause a storm; Bola was overthrown from the bubbling group and Nonso was judged by the "Scribes" and "Pharisees".

But they didn't care, for at last they were free to love and grow as a couple and of course as all classic love stories goes; they obviously lived happily ever after.

The End. 

Now bringing it back home (of course I was heading somewhere with that story), Bola in the story represents me (not in all components since from my records I can't remember leading a bubbling group..lol) and Nonso (not in all components also) represents God.

You see, I fell in love recently...

An engulfing-blood-pumping-spirit-calming kind of love and for a very very long time I have wanted to shout it out from the rooftop but in a world where the word God is censored in movies and where bringing up any topic concerning your spirituality either works as a guaranteed instant buzz killer or a willing walk into the overzealous religious fanatic box; I decided to keep quiet and privately enjoy my new found treasure; for asides not wanting to be placed in a box, I truly could not find the right words to describe how I feel. 

Until I listened to Switchfoot's song "The Day I Found God" (Thank you Ray) :

Since the lyrics are a practical description of how my walk in faith has been, I will breakdown parts of the song and relate it to my experience.

Hopefully that would provide a clear picture of my love affair and most importantly, just like a proud wife showing off her husband, I really do hope you get to see the awesomeness of God both in the lyrics of the song and my summary.

Here it goes...

"The Day That I Found God"

The morning comes like an enemy soldier

I feel the weight across my shoulders

I feel the shadows getting colder

But that ain't you

My Words: After various tragic events, I felt utterly alone and I was really convinced God was an illusion. 

This noose ain't getting any looser

I get so fearful about the future

I hear the shame of my accuser

But that ain't you

My Words: Even when I tried to pray it felt hallow and I was extremely scared of the future; remembering mistakes made and opportunities lost. 

I found strength but it wasn't what I thought

I found peace in the places I forgot

I found riches ain't the things that I had bought

I found out

The day I lost myself was the day that I found God

My Words: But in the midst of the pain and darkness, there was a certain indescribable peace and strength to take one step at a time. Material possessions brought no lasting comfort and I discovered my true wealth was hidden in God and the faces of my loved ones. A hallow shell ready to end it all became an available vessel for God. 

I get caught chasing my own illusions

I get so lost in these confusions

I keep on looking for my own solutions

But that ain't you, that ain’t you no

My Words: I tried to figure it all out on my own, Miss Independent had nothing on me, but just like going through a maze; I always ended up at this dead end - head spinning, with no way out. 

My enemies weren't the ones I had fought

My liberties weren't the freedoms I had sought

What I learned weren't the lessons I'd been taught

I found out the day I lost myself was

The day that I found God

My Words: Armed with a strong refusal to face my inner demons and my idea of an ideal life, I set out to make it solely on my own, why would I want to share the glory of my success story with anyone? 

Where is God out in the darkness?

Cause the voices in my head ain't talking honest

They're saying maybe you made us then forgot us

But that ain't you, that ain’t you no

My Words: But it was still dark, I fought so hard to stay afloat but I kept drowning daily and the deafening silence when I called out to God justified my belief that He was indeed an illusion. 

And all I know is that I still don't know a lot

I don't know how it ends I'm in the middle of this plot

My Words: And just when I was ready to lay in the desert and let my thirst end it all, I saw a pool of water and crawling to it; I drank and I keep drinking cause even though I am no longer desperately parched, I still need this water I have found, for it keeps me, and even though I have no idea how it would all end and I am no longer in control; I have never been this put together and free at the same time. I still don't know a lot but I know I never ever want to stop drinking from it. 

Yeah and I found grace for the man that I am not

Yeah, I found out the day I lost myself

Yeah, I found out the day I lost myself

Yeah, I found out

The day I lost myself was the day that I found God

My Words: I did not get a lot right and I still don't get somethings right but my Nonso, still loves me just as I am. The day I lost it all, the day I lost my will to live and the day I lost my life as I knew it; I found God and I found everything. 

PS: In Ibo dialect Nonso/Chukwunonso means God is near and up to this moment I didn't see the correlation with choosing that name for my story to the core message of this article -God is indeed near; sometimes we just need to look and we will find Him. 

End of Sermon...lol

You see, I am in love and I can't keep it hidden anymore. 

Smile. 

Which song can aptly describe an experience that means the world to you?